Dealing With Depression

Sadness can be a difficult emotion to deal with, not only due to the pain it causes, but also because of the factors that caused the sadness in the first place. Sadness can be the result of loss, helplessness, or disappointment, among many other things. It is important to remember, though, that sadness is one of the most common and natural human emotions, and is something that will ultimately help us appreciate our happy times.
Sometimes, though, it is possible for sadness to deepen, and this may be a sign that you are suffering from a form of depression. If you feel as though you are increasingly sad, and feel like your sadness is difficult to explain, this information on depression may help.

What Is Depression?
Depression is a disorder that is evidenced by excessive sadness, loss of interest in enjoyable things, and low motivation.
It is normal to experience feelings of sadness and dispair in response to adverse life events. Such events could include loss, major life changes, stress, or disappointment. In most cases, the sad feelings resolve as you come to terms with the changes in your life. In situations such as bereavement, these feelings may persist for months and return at significant times, such as birthdays and anniversaries related to the lost loved one. Provided you have times when you can enjoy things, however, this sadness is not a sign of depression.
Depression is common. One in three people will experience a major depressive episode at some stage in their lives. While most cases of depression are mild, about one person in ten will have a moderate or severe episode.

What Is Depression?
Depression is a disorder that is evidenced by excessive sadness, loss of interest in enjoyable things, and low motivation.
It is normal to experience feelings of sadness and dispair in response to adverse life events. Such events could include loss, major life changes, stress, or disappointment. In most cases, the sad feelings resolve as you come to terms with the changes in your life. In situations such as bereavement, these feelings may persist for months and return at significant times, such as birthdays and anniversaries related to the lost loved one. Provided you have times when you can enjoy things, however, this sadness is not a sign of depression.
Depression is common. One in three people will experience a major depressive episode at some stage in their lives. While most cases of depression are mild, about one person in ten will have a moderate or severe episode.

Physical Symptoms:

Loss of appetite with excessive loss of weight.

Loss of interest in sex.

Loss of energy, even when not physically active.

Loss of sleep despite feeling exhausted. Sleep is typically restless and unsatisfying with early morning wakening (one to two hours earlier than usual). Some people, however, may actually sleep a lot more than usual.

Slowed activity and speech.

How To Make Him Jealous

Every now and then, there may come a time when you get pissed off with a guy.

You may like him, you may be dating him, or you may have broken up with him.

But at the bottom of it all, you may want his attention or you may want to prove your worth to him.

And when you’re upset with a guy or just crying out for his attention, there are a few ways to pierce his heart and make him sit up and take notice of you.

And it all comes down to this.

For a guy to take notice of you, you need to become desirable in his eyes.

Better yet, you need to make him feel like you’re unattainable.

And the only way to do all this is by understanding how to make a guy jealous.

There are some ways to whet his appetite for your company. If your diary is always free, whenever he wants, he won't have as much value on your time. You need to create balance, use psychology that scarcity increases value. It can be hard because on some level you will feel deprived yourself. However, I promise you that not being as available will increase his interest in you.

1. Don't pick up the phone immediately every time he calls. An odd time even let it go to voicemail. Let those old texts lie, texting is really too impersonal, you want him with you, 2nd best is calling.

2. Have BlackOut times, like an exercise classes, afternoon tea or lunch with a friend. If he wants to see you Mondays and you are tired, make an excuse, don't burst a gut.

3. Make sure he knows that though you are unavailable sometimes, you are available...say...Saturday night.

4. Remember if he can 'slot' you into his diary at times that suit him only, i.e you go out of your way to suit him. He may not then see you at times which would be better for your timetable, like when you've more time to get ready, have your hair done, you have a free evening and day off next day. If you want those times filled, you cut down on his other times that don't suit you.

5. Never change your arrangements, letting down friends to be with him. Don't let him call the shots. Your time is important too, he needs to respect that. Don't be afraid to make an arrangement for, say, Saturday night if he hasn't made solid plans to be with you. This will make him book you in advance.

6. Make sure he knows you have a life you enjoy when you aren't with him. This makes you more attractive, and while you don''t want him jealous, let him wonder what YOU are up to in your busy, fun life, rather than assume you're there, all plans on hold trying to spend more time with him. He will feel trapped and like spending time with you is a chore if you nag him.

7. Take up a new hobby, take pride in your appearance, make subtle changes like a different lipstick, blow dry your hair differently, small changes no matter how subtle leave him thinking there is more to learn about you.

8. Have a good sense of humour.

9. Do not text, or call too much during the day, the less you are there through texts, mails, calls, the more he will have to spend time WITH you, which is what you want. Save your exciting news, bits of information, updates until he is with you..Keep phonecalls and text to the absolute minimum, just to make arrangements. Smile when you speak on the phone, speak slowly, but GET OFF

How To Get Him Back Without Seeming Needy Or Desperate

If you're a woman who has tried to get your ex back, you've
most likely taken the "desperate times call for desperate
measures" approach, causing you to do all kinds of
unfortunate things, including the walk of shame and the
drunk dial. These unflattering behaviors render you his
doormat, and ultimately push him away.

1. Don't disagree with why things ended. If he brings up
the reasons why your relationship ended, don't disagree with
him. Find the truth in what he's saying , acknowledge it and
apologize for it. It's better to be happy and loved than to be
right. Wanting to be right is your ego stepping in and
overshadowing your soul's desire to be happy and loved.

2. Don't try to convince him of all the reasons why he
should come back to you. Trying to convince your ex why
he should come back to you pushes him further away. It
reinforces why he's better off without you because you
appear needy and desperate . Needy and desperate are traits
that will kill any attraction he may have for you.Men are drawn to women who are happy with themselves.
So, be happy, live your life and let your radiant energy cause
him to second guess why you're not together. Remember,
you are a prize. You should never have to convince him to
be with you.

3. Take responsibility for your role in the breakup . In
every breakup you've experienced, you're the common
denominator. Instead of blaming him for what's happened,
look within and determine how you contributed to the
demise of your relationship. For instance, if you've tended to
question your exes because you have a hard time trusting
them, you have trust issues . Do the inner work to learn how
to trust yourself so that you become more trusting. If he
comes back, this issue won't resurface and cause another
breakup.
4. Let him come to you. A man places a higher value on
getting what he has to work for. When you miss your ex,
don't make it easy for him. Instead of calling him during a
weak moment, call a supportive friend. The space created
lets him miss you and wonder what you're doing. He will
contact you because he wants to see you, wants a booty call
(decline politely), misses you, etc. When he does, respond
accordingly. Avoid having sex with him until the issues that
led to the break up are resolved.
5. Put yourself first. Put yourself first and do what's best for
you. When he comes to you, don't pick up where the
relationship left off. At this point, he has more of an
incentive to resolve the issues that led to the breakup
because he wants you back. Now is the time to address and
work through these issues. Don't let him convince you that
the problem was yours. Even if the problem started with
you, the way he responded or didn't respond made things
worse.
Do the inner work to resolve these issues
without letting him know you're doing the work. The reason
you don't need to let him know is because he won't believe it
until he experiences the changes. Just do the work and see
how he responds. If he responds positively, you're moving in
the right direction. If he continues responding in the way
that contributed to your breakup, he's not the one for you .
6. Hold a clear and positive vision. Be clear on how you
want your relationship to be this time around. Then behave
and act in ways that support your vision and make you feel
good about yourself. Let things unfold naturally and stay
open to the outcome. If you find yourself becoming obsessed
with getting your ex back , relax and trust that things will
work out for your greater good. If he doesn’t come back ,
understand that there may be someone else who is better for
you. Let God, the higher power, the Universe or whatever
you believe in bring you the man you're supposed to be
with.

When you feel ignored by your partner

When you don't feel very important to your partner anymore
and it's driving you crazy, you can end up saying and doing all
kinds of things that just make your partner pull even further
away from you.
Whether your partner believes that he or she is guilty of
ignoring you is irrelevant because in most instances, feeling ignored is all in the eye
of the beholder.

When you feel ignored, no amount of logic and explanation can make it better.
And you can still be jealous and feel ignored even though your partner feels he or she
is giving you lots of attention.
So what do you do if you're feeling ignored by your partner and your jealousy
causes you to start fights which threaten to ruin your relationship?

1. Ask yourself if there are times when you don't feel ignored by your partner. If
there are times when you feel like you are getting the love you want from him or
her, then weigh how much of the time you feel you're being ignored.

2. If you're not getting what you want from your relationship most of the time, then
stop being angry and take a step to figure out if you can get it from this relationship.

The absolute truth is that you can't force someone to act in loving ways toward you if they
don't want to.
Stop the unhealthy cycle of being angry and fighting and look at this relationship in
an honest light. Look at whether you both want the same things overall and if you
do, then find ways to come together.
If not, ask for what you want and pay attention to what your partner says and
does. Notice whether he or she comes toward you or away from you during the next
few weeks or months.
Then you'll have your answer.
If you're being ignored, take a bird's eye view of your situation and honestly assess
whether it's a deal breaker for you or not.
If it isn't, you can learn not to be jealous in those situations and you can learn to
enjoy your relationship as you once did.
If it is, then take a step to see if change is possible and if it isn't, as much as it may be
painful to you, take a step toward leaving so you can create a better relationship for
yourself.

Why Can’t I Find Mr. Right?

Often times, women have asked the question why can’t I find “Mr. Right?” Does he really
exist? The answer is maybe “Mr. Right” is right in front of you but you haven’t taken
the time to notice him, or maybe you can’t see him because you are spending too much
time on the wrong man and you are missing your opportunity to meet “Mr. Right.”

Real talk ladies, you have to know yourself first to really know what you are
looking for in a man…

Ladies, a man may not fit your “check list” exactly, but if he’s a good person, hard
working, and respects you, isn’t that what is most important? I’m not saying a man
should not have specific qualities that are important to you because there might be
some definite deal breakers such as he may not respect you, or he may be someone
who cheats or is abusive. I’m just saying don’t close the door on a man too soon just
because he does not fit everything you want. A lot of women get it twisted on what’s
really important and what makes a good man. Just because a man looks good, drives
a nice car, has status, money or power does not necessarily make him a great catch.

The bottom line is you should have standards, but try to be a little flexible if a man
does not fit everything you want entirely. The truth is no one is perfect, but there
may be someone out there perfect for you if you just open yourself up to him without
all the conditions and recognize his inner qualities. Also take the time to know
yourself before you try to find a man because you may be surprised to learn that
your own issues may be the reason that you have not found “Mr. Right.”
Please endeavour to leave a comment and tell us what you think. ....

How do you let go of insecurities and just trust the guy you're with when you're afraid of getting hurt?

There is no 100% guarantee that your partner will not cheat again. There is no 100%
guarantee that you two will stay together. At the same time, there is no guarantee
that your partner WILL cheat again (or at all). There is no guarantee that you two
will break up either.

That's the thing about life and relationships . They can be nearly
impossible to predict.
It's probable that, when you fell in love with your partner and you two started
your relationship, you would not have guessed that he or she would have an affair .
Maybe you had your concerns and worries, but it's highly likely that you did not
think your love would cheat.
Yet, he or she did.
Now, if you have decided to try to rebuild trust and repair your relationship, your
mind might be overrun with fears that your partner will break your heart by
cheating again. These fears are understandable and they can also stand in the way
of you being able to do what it takes to help put your relationship back on track.
It's a real quandary.
You don't want to be lied to and hurt by infidelity ever again and so you get
cautious and tentative. This cautiousness can hold you back from opening up to the
healing and growth that's necessary to save your relationship.
It can feel like one step forward and many steps back all of the time.
It would be great if there was some absolutely reliable way to know-- without a
doubt-- that your partner is actually telling you the truth now and that he or she
has really changed.
But there's not.
However, you can be wise and aware and, at the same time, begin to consciously let
go of your tentativeness and holding yourself back. You can pay close attention to
signs in your partner, yourself and your relationship that help you make the best
decisions about your future.
Look for these 4 indicators that relationship trust is building and healing...
#1: Communication is more open than closed.
Healthy communication is key to any relationship-- especially one that is rebuilding
after an affair. Go within yourself and remember a time (in the past or more
recently) when you felt relaxed, at ease and as if you and your partner were really
listening to one another.
Next, think about a time when you two were rigidly set in your own points of view
and it seemed that neither of you was really hearing the other.
These are examples of being open and being closed. It's important that you know
how each way of communicating feels so that when you're talking with your partner
and you feel more open than usual and he or she seems more open to you, you can
notice it. Please endeavour to leave a comment and spell out your opinion.  Thanks r

Can you become friends after the break-up?

Answer: Yes and no. Sure we all know couples who are tighter after they split up but this is a rare situation and I personally think that these types of friendships still harbor unresolved issues from the relationship that make it so that neither party is ready or able to fully move on. While being openly hostile to an ex also demonstrates unresolved issues/feelings and an inability to move forward, being buddy-buddy with a former flame is not as mature and civilized as it may seem on the surface. That said it is more than possible, and the most desirable thing, if you and an ex can reach a place of peaceful co-existence and mutual respect. Please share  your opinions below....